Engagements
by jjmjmay
Summary: One shots resulting in Rayne engagements of some sort or another.
1. Well hell, I'd marry ya!

I own nothing these are other people's characters that I am toying with because . . . . . well . . . . . they didn't get enough episodes.

Engagements is going to be a series of one shots showing different scenarios that end up in Rayne engagements of some sort or another.

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Set 2 years after BDM:

The crew is able to do mainly legit cargo and passenger transportation since the alliance no longer has much sway outside of Core planets and even there has to use most of its resources to keep itself intact and not worrying about minor crime. Hoban Jacob Washburn is about 16 months and goes by Jake. Everyone loves Jake even Uncle Jayne. Simon and Kaylee have been engaged for over a year and their wedding will be on Kaylee's home world in 6 months. Mal and Inara are together. River is off med's, she still talks strangly at times and has the occasional "crazy time breakdown". They are non-violent and she usually acts strange enough before hand that they have fair warning. Jayne has taken on the responsibility of family protector and no longer drinks heavily although he still pays for sex it's not as often. He keeps it pretty discrete and gets back to Serenity as soon as he's done.

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**Engagements Chapter #1: Well hell, I'd marry ya!**

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It was a regular evening on Serenity. The crew was taking care of their separate bits of business but still congregating together as was often the case since Miranda. Simon and Kaylee were relaxing while going over details for their wedding as Zoe returned from putting Jake down for the evening. Inara was helping a grumbling Mal with some paperwork at one end of the table. Jayne and River were quietly working together cleaning their weapons on the other end. Zoe headed for an open seat at the table reflecting on how comfortable their little family had become. She wondered how long it would be before Kaylee convinced Simon to make it bigger. It never crossed her mind that Jayne and River may beat them to it.

_Kaylee: "River, you'll have to catch the bouquet its good luck you know!"_

Kaylee was rattling on about what type of arrangement they would use when it just flew out of her mouth. She wished it hadn't when she'd witnessed the pained expression on River's face. Honestly she should have known better if she'd stopped and thought. River had yet to show any interest in men that way and still didn't put much effort into how she looked or dressed. She even avoided social contact with anyone who wasn't crew.

_River: "She will not be chosen to participate in traditional bonding ceremony."_

_Kaylee: "I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sure lots a young men ull be trippin over themselves to get a dance at the wedding."_

_Simon: "Just give it time River. You've made wonderful progress and your social comfort will increase as you continue to recover."_

_Inara: "River you are an attractive and accomplished young woman. I have no doubt that you could attract whatever young man you desired if you chose to use your intelligence and intuition for that purpose. If you are interested I could give you plenty of tips and pointers on how to get and keep a mans attentions._

Jayne frowned to himself as he realized what Inara was suggesting. There was nothing wrong with her the way she was. River'd work just fine fer someone looking to have a family. If a man couldn't get past her funny talkin and weird dressin to see that then she'd be better off without em. Why didn't Mal tell her that? He never seemed to shut up any other time. Zoe was lookin symathetic but must a figured she had nothin to add.

_River: "Recovery is as complete as it will ever be. She will not engage in social deception to later be determined an unqualified partner when the truth becomes apparent. She has looked inside many and knows that she is not what is wanted."_

The room was frozen and silent. None of them seemed to know what to say. How do you argue that point with a mind reading psychic? Jayne looked at River for the first time since Kaylee's outburst. She held her head up refusing to hide the hurt from those she was closest to but also refusing to pity herself or except their pity. Seeing her inner strength on display caused something with in Jayne to miss fire. If he had a choice he wouldn't have said anything but no decision was necessary as the sound of his voice shocked everyone including his own self.

_Jayne: "Well hell, I'd marry ya!"_

Jayne could feel all six sets of eyes boring into him at once while he tried to make sense of what he'd just said. River was looking at him intently. He knew she didn't read crew if she could help it and she was starting to look almost sick or hurt as he stared back stupidly. She must a thought he was jokin but he weren't really. River'd be a right nice wife if a man were lookin to get hitched. He couldn't stand the look on her face and before he could stop himself he was talking again.

_Jayne: "I mean if in a man wanted family or some such, couldn't do no better an River."_

River's face softened as she realized that Jayne really believed that. He kept his thoughts and emotions closely guarded since Miranda. Hearing him express something like that in front of everybody, which he obviously felt she needed to know, made her feel special. Jayne didn't trust people in general let alone women and although he changed a lot in the last couple of years he like her didn't reach outside their small group other than his letters home. She felt warmth fill her up as the understanding of how much Jayne must respected her and hold her in high esteem fully sunk in. Of course it meant that he hadn't properly thought out what it would really mean to be attached to her permanently and that didn't sit well with her. She had to do her best to explain it in a way that he would understand. Now was most likely her best chance to tell him without interruption_, _seeing as everyone else was still shocked by Jayne's statements.

_River: "Thank you, but she isn't fit for such. This girl is dangerous, deadly and could accidentally hurt her mate. Still unstable, still crazy at times and still difficult to understand. Physical bonding will result in psychic binding and he would not be able to hide anything from her. His thoughts would no longer be his alone._

Jayne couldn't understand why her telling him stuff he already knew would change his mind. He also didn't bother to stop and wonder why he felt the need to convince her she was wrong.

_Jayne: "Go se River, them's all yer sellin points!"_

_River: "Not desirable traits in a life mate, no one would wish to purchase."_

_Jayne: "Some guys need a woman who can keep em in line . . . . n can't never have nough pi gu kickers round." _

The room was still silent and River was just studying him so he must not have made his point well enough.

_Jayne: "Yain't crazier than any other woman really plus ya got a real excuse n ya haven't hurt any us since ya been off med's. . Ahh. . The talkin is kind a intrestin once ya get used ta it cause yer real smart."_

What the hell was he doing? She was still studying him so he tried once more.

_Jayne: "Well that mind readin stuff dats the best thing. Ya can just tell what a guy really means. Know he were the right one from the get go. Could see that he really were sorry when he screwed up. Be able to figure out what yer little ones want even before theys talkin."  
_

Finally she was smiling and he could shut up. He chanced a glance around the room but nothing had changed since the last time. Seemed they were all happy to quietly watch him make a fool of himself.

Jayne was confused by what he'd just done but it was making perfect sense to River. A predatory smile bloomed across her features..

_River: "Why did you never marry, Jayne?"_

_Jayne: "Huh . . . a guess I learned not to trust women none."_

_River: "Meaning at some point you wanted to have a family?"  
_

_Jayne: "Seem ta member figurin on it growin up like everyone else."_

_River: "If one could be trusted would you reconsider what broken trust caused you to discard?"_

_Jayne: "What's that now? . . . . .Oh ahh guess I'm gettin a bit old now n ain't like to find a gal worth marryin who'd be willin."_

_River: "Kaylee. Thank you for the offer of good luck and good fortune but it will not be needed." _

_Kaylee: "umm, alright mei mei."_

_River: "Jayne-Man come along now. This girl has considered your offer, found herself willing and is one that you trust. We must out line general relationship rules, decide on proper number of progeny and chose our symbols of unity."  
_

River took Jayne's hand and began to drag him along to a more private setting. The rest of the crew had trouble finding their voice as it dawned on them that Jayne and River had just gotten engaged. Jayne stared back helplessly at them over his shoulder as he followed River along and she began to prattle again.

_River: "Don't be scared my Jayne but there will be kissing on the mouth. It is not negotiable so this is a chance for you to learn that compromise in married terms means doing what the wife says."  
_

The End.

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Authors Notes:

Thanks for reading hope you've enjoyed it.


	2. Little Things

I own nothing these are other people's characters that I am toying with because . . . . . well . . . . . they didn't get enough episodes.

Engagements is going to be a series of one shots showing different scenarios that end up in Rayne engagements of some sort or another.

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Set 2 years after BDM:

The crew is able to do mainly legit cargo and passenger transportation since the alliance no longer has much sway outside of Core planets and even there has to use most of its resources to keep itself intact and not worrying about minor crime. Hoban Jacob Washburn is about 16 months and goes by Jake. Everyone loves Jake even Uncle Jayne. Simon and Kaylee married a year after BDM and are ready to start their own family. Mal and Inara are together, she maintains her companions license because it comes in handy but doesn't service clients sexually and is also the co-pilot. River is off med's, she still talks strangely at times and has the occasional "crazy time breakdown", they are non-violent and she usually acts strange enough before hand that they have enough warning. She has recovered well, takes care of her appearance and has been actively looking for someone to share her life with. River doesn't read crew if she can help it but Jayne has also learned to block his thoughts from her pretty thoroughly. Jayne has taken on the responsibility of family protector, no longer drinks heavily and has spent very little time off ship by himself since Simon and Kaylee got married. Jayne and River have developed a tight friendship since they often end up together by default.

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**Engagements Chapter #2: Little Things  
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Ahhh, third try to politely extricate herself from conversation. This was the fourth man who'd approached her this evening and he was by far the foulest although his outward appearance was most agreeable. This was a stop they frequented and she had hoped to meet a man at this festival that was worth seeing again at a later date. Oohhh, she could feel him coming and moved back just in time to watch Jayne drop him with a large meaty fist to the cheek bone. He was about to get grabby, hadn't allowed her to politely brush him off and was a pig so there was no need to stop Jayne. Another unsuccessful evening attempting to find a good lead on a life mate. Her mounting catalog of data pointed more and more toward herself being the reason especially in the situations where she had actually initiated relationship procedures. . . . . . . . .

The first had been Freddie, the smart quirky pilot that Mal had obviously hired because he reminded him a bit of Wash. He'd thought she was cute and genuinely enjoyed her personality. They'd gotten along well that initial month and had their first official date planned. Mal had called it a "low-key meet" still she was required to hang back in the bar and signal if anything was amiss while Jayne and Mal made the deal. Freddie tagged along so they could head off on their own as soon as Mal was through. The contact was solid but bad mouthed the Independent's which caused Mal to start an epic brawl. She could feel fear oozing from Freddie while she and Jayne were enjoying shop talk after leaving the torn up tavern. He'd gotten one glimpse of what she could do and he wanted no part of her. Freddie withdrew from her, Jayne glared and growled at him constantly then a month later he disappeared once they'd made port at Persperone. River went back to being the main pilot and Inara began training as the co-pilot.

After that it had been Michael. He was the port foreman for the biggest trading company on Lansdown which was a busy shipping moon they were commonly running cargo to or from. There had been a lot of flirting and an eventual date. She was stressed and Michael's excitement didn't help. He'd escorted her back to Serenity as soon as he'd noticed she was acting strangely. They got there just as she'd gone into a full-blown episode and Michael was relieved to hand her off to Jayne, who for some reason was hanging around Serenity even though Mal had given him leave. Michael avoided everything other than polite business conversation with her after that but his thoughts about her were hurtful. Jayne took every opportunity to intimidate the man since which was fine with her.

Then it had been Ethan a young passenger who was with them for three weeks. He was relocating to one of their regular stops to take a job as a teacher but there were a few drops to make beforehand. The first couple of weeks had been wonderful and there was even a brief kiss one evening before she turned in. Things had gone sour in the morning when she'd slipped up and mentioned something she couldn't have known. After quickly explaining that she sometimes had psychic visions without giving away any vital information her heart sunk as she read his reaction. He wanted nothing to do with a woman who could read his or anyone's thoughts ever. Then he'd said it was fine and she'd seen the intention in his mind to at least get sex from the weirdo freak before his trip was through. Jayne figured out something was up and offered to beat him to death or as much as she felt he deserved. After she declined he still dutifully made sure that she was never alone with Ethan the final week.

Jayne snapped her out of her thoughts. "Ya OK? Sorry, know ya can take care yourself but that one was really buggin me." She'd been spacing out and could slightly sense his concern for her even though he kept his metal and emotion broadcasting under tight control. "Thank you, he was deserving. You may return to whoever . . . " He interrupted with, "Nah, don't know what I was doin anyways. Sides kinda weird trying ta be myself with woman I don't know. Guess a don't trust em nough to be me." He looked casual and she wasn't getting any reading from him as he continued. "Spect I could land some woman but it don't seem the same na more. Be heading back myself ya comin?" She nodded her acceptance and they began the hike back that she calculated at roughly 2.145 miles.

They quickly fell into their own comfortable rhythm moving along together. River quite liked what they had become however horribly it began. They meshed so well these days, what had started out as working well together had overflowed into everything they did. There was a level of comfort and understanding they shared which she didn't have with anyone else. Weather they spent their time quietly, teasing, fighting or venting at each other there was an underlying stability in what they had built that assured her they weren't going backward. Why couldn't she find someone like Jayne who was actually interested in her. Someone who wasn't afraid of her, didn't mind her occasional crazy fit or her strange way of speaking, wasn't intimidated by her abilities or intelligence huh actually realized she was intelligent. She liked the way he didn't expect anything from her when they did things together. They would be good for each other except Jayne lacked a sexual interest. It wasn't just that but also the desire that she sees between Mal and Inara, Simon and Kaylee or what Wash and Zoe shared. In fact she hadn't felt that for or from any man. Her brain was spinning so fast again, Jayne had a way of slowing it down when they conversed.

"Jayne, why can't I find a man who sincerely desires me?" He didn't acknowledge her for a moment as he scanned the area ahead. "Hell girl you're real sexy in yer own way." It seems that's all he was willing to offer so she clarified. "Not lust or want but desires me and needs me to desire him." He seemed more comfortable with that. "I ain't gotta lot know how with love n such, but my Pa used ta say it was little things that done em in with Ma. Things she done that was just her an they'd stick with em spark somethin inside. Said same things bugged the hell outta em after years but they'd be first things he'd miss when they weren't together a day or two." She tried to rephrase what he'd communicated. "So, little things beget love and together they equate desire?" He responded with, "Guess that's one way a sayin it."

After digesting that and cross referencing it in relation to the relationships on Serenity she felt it had validity. "Like what?" He flashed her a confused look. "What little things about me could turn into love and then desire?" Jayne considered for a short time before coming up with an answer he seemed to approve of. "Spose the way yer brow crinkles and head tilts a bit when yer tryin to suss somethin out. N then that little smile when yer face relaxes once ya get it. Kind a thing could creep up on a man without his notice." She wondered how often she did that for him to notice. Was she doing it now? Wait! He'd noticed what he considered a 'little thing" that lead to love and then desire. "What else? She must know them all, has to recognize any possible match!" He gave her his patented "yer nuts" look so she stared at him and waited knowing he'd relent if she did it long enough.

"There's ah the way you's skirt around kinda floatin on yer toes when ya ain't wearin nothin on yer feet. Them long skinny feet that I seen takin out plenty a man have a way a catchin the eye and stickin with me." He glanced over then so she stared back expectantly. "Ya's always makin faces and rollin yer eyes at Mal or Simon when they ain't lookin. That never gets old even though I figure ya do it ta me too. Way ya can make somethin real simple all complicated with that giant brain a yers always keeps things real interestin." Jayne paused long enough to figure out she was again waiting for him to continue. "Got a way of movin an sittin and twistin round in general that's hard ta explain, its just you no one moves like you. . . Probably my favorite's the way ya can light up like a kid at anytime with them big wide eyes like the verse is some bright shiny new place ya never been . . . . . That's nough a me tootin yer horn you figure the rest out yerself Moony."

"Jayne we get on so well lets plan our own engagement next time we are planet side. We won't have to worry about being anyone or anything that we aren't already when we're together." Jayne looked appalled. "Engagement ain't that like getting hitched?" She gave him a half-hearted frown. "Assurance, betrothal, bond, commitment, contract, espousal, obligation, pact, troth and many others. Its any number of agreed upon happenstances or appointments. Would you prefer we call it a date?" she teased "Aright genius ya made yer point. I'm in whatever ya wanna call it." River sent Jayne her best smile. "Oh it will be great! We must research thoroughly and make a detailed plan." Jayne was suddenly giving her his fake intimidating look. "Not too much plannin woman, point is ta have fun." Her brain was picking up speed again. So many plans needed to be made and large numbers of calculations needed to be quantified if she was to turn this first engagement into an actual engagement.

Jayne had a strange warning itch in the back of his brain as he watched River's brow crinkle and her head tilt just a bit. There was something big he was supposed to know but it eluded him. In the end he decided to ignore it since it was River. She'd a killed him long ago if she ever wanted to hurt him and he figured anything else she was up to was probably for the better considering how smart she was. He suddenly wondered if he'd ever really understand what his Pa been telling him about his Ma. He thought he had once a long time ago but nah that wasn't the same thing his Pa had described. If he ever did get to feeling that way and the woman was cracked enough to love him back he'd sure as hell never let her go.

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Author's notes:

If you enjoyed this particular engagement it is expanded upon in my story called "Little Things"

Thanks as always for reading and all feedback is welcome.


	3. A Misunderstood Engagement

I own nothing these are other people's characters that I am toying with because . . . . . well . . . . . they didn't get enough episodes.

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Set 14 months after BDM:

The crew is able to do mainly legit cargo and passenger transportation since the alliance no longer has much sway outside of Core planets and even there has to use most of its resources to keep itself intact and not worrying about minor crime. Hoban Jacob Washburn is about 7 months and goes by Jake. Everyone loves Jake even Uncle Jayne. Simon and Kaylee were just recently married Mal and Inara are together, she maintains her companions license because it comes in handy but doesn't service clients sexually and is also the co-pilot. River is off med's, she still talks strangely at times and has the occasional "crazy time breakdown", they are non-violent and she usually acts strange enough beforehand that they have a warning. She does basic personal grooming and always looks neat and clean although she makes no attempts to beautify herself. Even her wardrobe although now fitted to her is simple, modest and functional. River has worked hard to avoid reading crew and they have all learned to quiet themselves to help her. Jayne has taken the responsibility of family protector seriously and no longer drinks heavily. He does still hit the cat houses regularly all be it much more discretely.

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**SPECIAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT:** This idea comes from a suggestion by a reviewer: _"Can you make one of the engagements be one where Jayne has to convince River of his own accord, and without any previous knowledge about it from River?"_ It was a tricky thing to come up with a scenario where Jayne would try to get River to marry him out of the blue, much less have him do in a way that River would actually accept. So special thanks to my muse, **Irishbrneyes** for the challenge.

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Chapter #3: A Misunderstood Engagement

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Jayne had just finished showering after double checking the cargo and getting some lifting in. They were due in Persephone the next day and he figured now was as good a time as any to get his inoculation from Simon. He heard them talking in the lounge when he was still around the corner. He wasn't about to pass up on the opportunity to eavesdrop on the Tam's. It wasn't malicious anymore, just curious and part of who he was. "River I understand your hesitation but who knows what will happen if we just leave them to continue looking." Jayne was really paying attention now, this could be a security issue and he'd be damned if he let anything happen to Serenity's crew on his watch. "Not ready, there will be questions and expectations." Something was seriously wrong, she sounded small and hurt to Jayne. "I know, but you may never be ready. This is a way to assure that they won't come after us or send someone else. Besides I've already made the engagement." Engagement! Jayne was seeing red but he forced himself to stay still and listen. "Don't look at me like that I used a public wave on Landsdown and set it up for a few hours before we leave Persephone. They'll be waiting to hear from us. I have learned a few things out here in the black little sister." At least he was being cautious still the way River had sounded worried him. "I'll do most of the talking, all you have to do this time is be there and talk a little bit. I'm doing this for you it's the best way to keep things on our terms." Jayne was holding his breath waiting for River to tell Simon off. "Ok, Simon but no one will be impressed by a broken toy. She will only speak sparingly for these preliminaries."

That was too much for Jayne he stormed back to his bunk. He was furious it wasn't right the girl-weapon, crazy-woman thing had worked too hard for her freedom. He knew Simon would do anything to protect her so he tried to calm down and think it through. The best he could figure was some sort of rich core people rules where her parents or the government could get control of her if she weren't married. Even if he knew the rules he probably wasn't smart enough to understand them and if there was some way out Simon or River would have found it with those big brains of theirs. River didn't have any interest in men, she didn't socialize outside the crew and even that was awkward at times. Jayne's idea of right and wrong was pretty vague but he knew for sure that it was wrong for little-crazy to have to sex some man Simon picked out just to keep her safe when she weren't even comfortable touching people in general. He couldn't trust some man to have that kind of control over Moony just wasn't going to happen. Mal was tied up with Inara and Simon was married plus he was her brother. That just left him. Jayne had planned on going with Mal early in the day to drop off the cargo and then finding some quick trim before getting back to the ship because they had another job already lined up. That meant he'd have to get her to agree to it before they left in the morning.

First he reviewed the reasons he wanted to do this; River would ask she always wanted to know everything. If she had to get married to stay safe he'd do it instead of trusting some stranger. He didn't want her having to sex any one she didn't want to either. He felt he'd done well with that, it was pretty simple. Then he struggled to come up with anything about the situation that would appeal to her. He was pretty sure she didn't like him and that she probably thought he was big and disgusting like the other woman did. He still had nothing going by dinner time but he knew Mal would make a fuss if he didn't show. He ate quickly and mumbled quick responses the few times someone tried to include him in conversation. Zoe and River where the only ones who seemed to think anything was off with him as he caught both looking at him inquisitively a couple of times before he'd left. After spending another hour getting nowhere he was starting to think it was a lost cause. He thought back to the conversation he'd heard. River didn't want to marry this stranger, hell she didn't even want to talk to him. That was it, he didn't need to make her want to marry him he just needed to make her see that it was better to marry him than this other guy. He needed to figure out how he could make it not so bad for River to be married to him. That was still tough but doable. He decided he better write it down as a list so he wouldn't forget when he talked to her.

River was not looking forward to today. She'd seen them on the cortex as well but didn't see the harm in ignoring them. She doubted her parents cared enough to focus a substantial amount of their resources on finding them and thus it was highly unlikely for them to ever cause them serious issues. It was more than likely an attempt to ease any little guilt they may have felt while putting on a good public front. Now that their warrants were revoked and they were cleared of any wrongdoing it would certainly look bad if they didn't at least make a show of trying to find their poor misguided children. She knew that Simon wanted some sort of reconciliation with them. He truly did feel it was the right thing to do and that it would avoid possible problems with them in the future. She'd agreed because when they found out that Simon had married a rim born woman and when they saw her condition they would never wish to see them again even if they maintained some sort of communication. They were due to land in just under two hours and she'd already double checked everything. All she had to do was wait around most of the day for an unpleasant and slightly humiliating experience. Her face grimaced as she pulled her knee's up and hugged them to her chest. She leaned her head back against the chair, concentrated on the hum of Serenity's engine and smiled. She had more good things now than she'd ever thought possible when she'd first understood what the Academy actually was.

When Jayne had made it to breakfast River was just finishing up and had skipped off quickly to the bridge. Zoe was still feeding Jake as Mal and Inara appeared. After he'd finished eating Mal had gone over the cargo drop with him again. This was the easy end just dropping off the goods to Badger and collecting their pay before Jayne would be free to do what he wanted the rest of the day. With Mal satisfied Jayne grumbled about work and made his way out to his bunk. He dropped down and got his list before climbing back out and making sure no one was around while he quietly moved toward the bridge. After listening for a moment or two he was sure that she was by herself. He read his list one last time and tried to remember everything he had thought about saying before clomping his way up the steps to make sure he didn't startle her.

River had just settled back into the pilot's seat and begun to review her blessings when she heard what could only be Jayne making noise on purpose. For a large man he was extremely stealthy when he wanted to be and was smooth enough in his normal movement that she wondered why he was broadcasting his arrival to her. When he settled in the copilot's chair it was clear that he was actually there to talk to her and not just to deliver a message. This had never happened before it was a change in their pattern so she put her legs down and turned her chair toward him. He looked anxious and had a small piece of paper in his hand. "Look I heard about this engagement an it ain't right whatever Simon thinks." She was momentarily confused and then surprised that he would know or care about the wave to her parents later today. "I know ya don't even like men so's we can't trust this stranger an marry ya off ta him!" Damn, River was just staring at him with big wide eyes, he'd hoped she would understand where he was going with this. "If ya marry me then ya don't have ta marry him." Jayne was looking at her imploringly and she briefly considered that she had totally lost the mental control she'd worked so hard to build. Why did he think she didn't like men? Who was she supposed to marry, why was Jayne a better option and what did that have to do with the wave later today? Engagement, that's what Simon had said and Jayne had repeated. "I got a bunch a reasons it'll be better this way." He glanced at the paper in his hand as River finally put the pieces together. He thought she had to get married and was trying to use it to his advantage. She recalled how he had wanted Saffron to warm his bed, cook for him and clean up after him. "I think I's got enough ta get ya a nice ring and you can pick." He thought he could buy her with a ring! What other ways did he think he could trick the crazy girl? She'd thought he had changed some since Miranda. River lunged quickly snaring the paper before sitting down and trying to give him a warning glare but she could feel the prickle of tears forming. She looked down quickly to read the evidence against him.

_- Ways ta make it not so bad fer River_

_- 1. Let her buy a nice ring with the credits ya got saved._

_- 2. Never tuch her n stay on my side a the bed._

_- 3. No sex er flertin with other women._

_- 4. Don't make her do no chors er wife stuff._

_- 5. Treet her good like Ma says ta treet a wife._

_- 6. Make sure to shower alot an keep things cleaned up._

_- 7. Give her all the extra credits._

_- 8. Try an do what she asks._

_- 9. Do one nice thing a day cause she's yer wife._

_- 10. If she meats a man she wants let her marry him._

Jayne knew that he'd botched the whole thing, she looked so upset he wondered if she would kill him with her brain. Sure he weren't real smart like her and didn't talk pretty but he didn't understand why she was so pissed off. He knew she didn't want to marry him but he was trying to help and the thought of some stranger touching her twisted him up something fierce. "He's serious." It wasn't a question, she was looking at him now, he could see the tracks where a few tears had escaped but she didn't look like she wanted to kill him. "He would really give up sex to protect her virtue?" This time it was a question. "Well I've had lots a sex an Ma'd kill me if I was unfaithful even if we's just married cause ya had to." She was really looking at him now and he hoped she wasn't reading him. "Why?" The grin she was suddenly wearing was unnerving. "Simon thinks this man is good like him but he ain't or he'd already have some shiny wife a his own. Somethin's wrong with him an I can't let him get ya and touch ya." He spit out the last bit like he'd eaten something foul. "Who will he let touch her?" She'd shot the question back quickly and he answered in kind without thinking. "No one!" River could see that Jayne was angry at the thought of a man touching her. He wasn't always aware of his own emotions but he always acted instinctively on them. "Will he honor the list if they marry?" Gorram finally all he had to do was follow that list to keep that man's hands off a River. "Yah, and we could even add some if ya needed ta. That there was just the best I could come up with." He had never used we when talking about the two of them before this conversation and that was the second time. "I would like to cross out 2,4 and 10. We can decide together how to spend our extra credits. She wishes for a long engagement and he must let her keep the list." Jayne wasn't sure which ones 2,4 and 10 were but he wasn't quick enough to hide his smile as he agreed with a nod. "She must explain the other engagement and allow him one chance to reconsider." . . . . . . . . . . .

Mal was surprised when River accompanied them to the drop and explained it by saying Jayne was going to help her run an errand when they were finished before escorting her to a meeting with Simon. Simon was shocked when River not only arrived with Jayne but had him sit down with them for the wave. They'd only just arrived on time so he didn't have a chance to question them as he programmed his parents wave coordinates. There they were looking expectantly at him, he couldn't believe it was really them. River beat him to the greeting. "Mother, Father this is my fiancée, Jayne. Simon has married but his wife couldn't make it." Simon found he'd fallen out of his chair and was looking up at a grinning mercenary who was holding Rivers hand out so he could see her ring.

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Author's notes:

Irishbrneyes, I hope I was able to do your idea justice. Thanks again.

Thanks as always for reading and all feedback is welcome.


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